Momma Drama II
I guess if they hate me, they are leaving someone else alone. Ever been there? Ha ha.. I have, many times. Guess I have this problem with the “truth”. People on the other end of the “truth” have a hard time hearing it.
You have to love those mommies that linger in the practice gyms and yell out over the top of the directors and the instructors. What I’ve learned about those lingering mommies through the years is that:
– lingering mommies better be front and center when the real deal “the dance” is being performed. Chances are the student no longer can hear the director or instructor because Momma has to be sought out.
-Watch their little faces as they look around on the floor for a focus point. Where is momma? Not where is coach or teacher, but rather “where is momma”.
Drama mamma re-visited.
It’s not that mom’s deliberately want to take over, they just haven’t burned out yet. They haven’t gotten to the point that they ALLOW the directors and instructors to take charge. They some how think that by injecting their ideas at a competition, that – that will somehow make it all smoother. NOT!
Words of advice for moms. You need to be the best cheerleader for your young dancer that you can be. But unfortunately you have to do that on the side lines. Just like football, you can’t be on the field. You can’t be there to hold their hands. They have to experience it to learn. It’s hard
for moms to learn.
I burned out early. Somewhere in the 4th grade. But back then the coach really knew what she was doing. She had a lot invested in the studio where my child was. She was a wonderful lady, and a hell of a good coach. Not only would she yell at all those precious darlings, she did it with bull horn. You know those big horns like the cheerleaders use to get their message heard. Had a whistle one year.
Here is quick example of when you may have pushed to far.
You paint your fence white, and you leave one section to be done later. You have plenty of time to finish it before the sun sets, so you take a tea break.
Well, you come home from your break to find that your neighbor has painted the remaining fence green, because it matches their landscape. They just simple thought you had forgotten that section. Besides “isn’t green pretty”?
Things like this happen in dance too. It deals with creative rights. I can see solo’s being redone here and there. I can see team dances getting adjusted to the team level. What is hard for people who actually are at the ground level, studying and designing the works to deal with, is “the green fence drama”.
Yes the truth hurts. But….if you are a director or instructor of a young team, you have to have someone say the “truth” eventually. The earlier you tell the truth – the quicker you can deal with any momma posse. Not saying you will have one – but…… yeah……
The upturn on this re-visting of momma drama is just to make sure that you young directors and instructors stay on your toes. You have the right to control your team. If you let the parents take over they will. They will run you into the ground, and then blame you. You have to stand up and defend your position. There will be parent who try to control other parents as well – beware the momma posse. On a whole most parents are reasonable and use commen sense. But…in a competition setting that can change.
You shouldn’t have to walk on pens and needles around your parents. That is something “the first something” that you will need to nail in the bud. You are in charge! You will have to tell the “truth ladies”, and it will hurt. Sometimes it’s you who hurts.
Trust is earned, so be strong and don’t back down. Your little girls need you. Go be with them as they dance.
I was a dang good drama momma in my days. So when I tell someone the “truth” You know it’s gonna hurt. Who knows, 10 or 15 years from now – you might have to tell some young mom the “truth” too.
Lock and load ladies.